Why is it, that time created distance, And why from persistence, this time, Came great suffering, and pestilence. Given tongue, and often structure, In return: local, but of foreign work, Until laughter, then giving up. Why is it, that you have so much? And share little with anyone else. Why is it, that you hate so much? And have love for only yourself... Given love, and given supper, And little of anything else. Envy itself, has deadly effect, And little of anything else.
Whiter upon the mirror face, While rubbed upon, bitter taste, Why, are you so irritated? You will never see them as I see them, Dull, sullen and grey. Wool, spun into braid. What else should I say? I envy everything you have, Even if you gave it away. Writer, upon feeling erase, Like graphite filled veins, I have everything to give, And I can give it away. White, upon the fearing caste, While rubbed upon, bitter taste, Why? The fear of being placated, Like rubber farms treat waste.
Aversion to food, Repulsion, to new, Compulsion to move. I can teach every piece, How to act like a queen, And handle a gun too. Substance abuse, Strum of the lute, Analyze the root, What else is there to do? Different from truth, Discernment of rules, Intersections near you, Diameter of the moon. Enthusiasm for two, Quadratures of lune, Assertion of youth, What else is there to do? Sit around saying I love you? Well, compared to whom? All I am is a friend, A Nobody to see through.
Where did the first seed grow? Plus, who owns it? Monsanto needs to know... for the lawsuit, Above the Earth, also below, Orchards grow. What you reap is what you sow, But, who owns it? You, or someone you don't know? Whose wish is to have your wish, And everything else you covet. Orchard, apples never fall far from, So, they know where to find you, And everything else you love... Orchard, to the Italian restaurant Sold to you at whatever cost, Like internet does to things you love, Nostalgia wears off like a bitter rust. Orchard, what have we done? Orchard, where have you gone? Orchards, and we moved on, Into the distance, back to god. What you reap is what you sow, But, who owns it? Like Cleopatra said to Rome: Above the Earth, so below. Above them both, Orchards grow.
Thinking of exposure, orange, Are you coming over? Oh... From emotion to hypnosis, Light comes from the phone. Talking frozen yogurts, awards, Terrifying rollercoasters, poets. Light comes from the phone, Orange how the redness shows, Awe, gathering rosebuds below. When I wrote about you it showed, Both you and I know it, What else do I love? Suppose you had died, What else would I have? Hope you might fly home? Well, I paid for it anyway... Light comes from the phone, Blindness from my brain, Tiredness of fate. Like edamame on a plate, Somehow, I hoped for more, Even if it was more the same
Red, rabbit owner. Filler of the holes, Horror, else. Where do rabbits run? Back to holes themselves... Answers of importance Over Hammond organs, Hare, over tortoise. Whether or not, She understood my poems. Every time the rabbit runs, It ends between cardinal shoulders.
'I just wish, with all the time I have left', As she squeezes her fists, laments, Her eyes see ideas she never said, Sadness bookends her existence. She knows what she is, and lies, She thinks she knows what's best, But she is losing her desire for life. I just wish, like all the cows she loves, She would fight and fawn over me for once. The person she sees staring into the sky, It seems she likes, but she rarely sees herself. Mostly other men, me, and occasionally, marquee lights. She thinks it's for the best, I'm sure. The person she reveals herself to be, As the ocean fares, she holds against, My love can only take so many hits, She says, as she sets the table, For two people, but never herself. She says in the end, it's for the best. What happened to the things she liked? She thinks to herself in a flight, Reminded of a dream, desires, Meets someone else and tries. Time is a god of fire, however, So it takes and destroys her, Inside first, then outside. What she does with her life, It's none of my concern, Fans in the crowd fight amongst themselves, Not with players they revere and beheld. I think I know what's best, but in the end, I knew very little of what I said, Even less of the outcomes she had. So, who am I, to wish?
Compare deceased, compare diseases, Civil registry, never ending dreams. Quiet, discontented tree: Questions vex me silent, Why do we drink of selfish need? Why do we eat to reddish green? Why do they scream your scaring me, While I achieve new levels of self deceit? It responds, about roots and leaves, Tools and people, fools and fees. It's beyond me to understand. Again indeed. Only man writes with a pen, Ire infinite, to the final syllable. A point most misunderstand: Life is not miracles, appearances, Science fiction or analyzing images, It's mostly the wheres and whens, Indeeds said again, friends you miss. Like all the pyramids get built, You'll find they went brick by brick. Like kids, chimes in the wind, Ideally they play without worry, Not re-examine life endlessly, Like a firing squad that never hits. Like a chime without another, It takes only one to be lonely, Two people to live. Hair recedes, favour leaves, Ferris wheels and screams, Once again, the tree speaks, This time about seasons, Blues and greens, Views and seeds, You open your own mouth, freely, Someone else's dreams. Again indeed. A mirror responds vaguely, Instead of self reflection sees, Things that terrify, Even when they close their eyes and they sleep. One could compare their life to a sheep, Sheppard, or favoured elite. What one eats someone decides, Where one sleeps someone else decides, Who one sees is limited, they cry. But they compare to a bar too high. Then with their time, belies, nevers, freezes. Feelings of timidness, cheapness, lies, Triangles you hope to avoid thinking, Inevitably though you need drink. You need some chips, think about it. You need a horse to ride to the store, Because you're lazy as shit. So I guess just hope for the best, But also go for it. Again, Indeed.
I can't fly, I buy a plane, afraid, Is it I, or the world that changed? Doing, but why? Moon in the sky, The music has died away: Civilized, civil eyes describe, My cymbals, rides and chains. Time changes, I stay behind, afraid, I can't fly, I can't buy a plane, Or move to a space in my mind, Tiny place, stimuli, to hide my pain. Like shrines to a saint, myself, I can overprice, play faces like chess, Trite, then replace with tech. In my camp by the lake, Water arrests the trees. Wolf, that tames itself, Realizes little of anyone else, Sees no bigger dreams, Eats the best, but what for me?
A horn right where the heart is, A horn is where we started, Beasts of a Godhead, snort, What else would they know? Seven heads, Seven hills, a woman sits, Fearing what we couldn't fix is still amiss, On top of the hill, one digests the hits, The house my father built is sticks. This calls for a mind with wisdom, Or A horn right where the heart is. For economics, For a little longer, For when they finally got it, The realization, it was violent. Then floods, then nothing. No foundation to stand on, I must found myself, found my call, But the houses my father built are gone.
the santan dew crawls out of the stalk if you break it apart from the bush suddenly it burns brighter than dust small grand doors tiptoed to kiss their frames held by hinges, but try to reach north alas, their fates are back and forth there’s a somnolence to homes that are not yours holed with metaphors you never explored to tell your throat is for similes or possibly something else i wonder if wells hear wishes or if they are mere echoes of aired fulfillment perhaps that’s why the well water only gets to see the sky even if i bury my fingers beneath the soil, i am no root. even when i draw lines on the sand, i make no shore.
Third time was the charm A tormented soul bled out Life worth loving, lost Lonely surrounded,/ A house filled with laughter, but/ Today I feel blue Under darkest shroud/ These green eyes find no sunshine/ Not today at least Force another breath This impenetrable funk And me stuck in it Static in my head/ A sound no one else can hear/ And I can’t escape It’s a feeling blue For no good goddamn reason Sucky kind of day Disconnected from all Desperation rules my head The world seems too small
OCDemons An O for the things that I just can’t let go And maybe it’s not even the same things as last week, But there all the same, Ground into my head As though they were the only thoughts that ever mattered Sacred and necessary Though likely invisible or nonexistent just a few days ago And maybe tucked back into the void In just a few more But I suppose it’s better than time spent Wondering What a head-on collision would be like Or how it might feel To put knife through bone It’s dangerous Inside my head sometimes C for the things that I just can’t not do Always look right when crossing a bridge Wear just enough purple Get the numbers right Watch the color patterns Check and check and check again I tell myself I do these things To clear a clouded head Unfortunately Seems to do The opposite instead D for the disorder in my head Brought on by A record on repeat all day, A ridiculous collection of unbreakable rules And the “honestly, what would REALLY happen?” Thoughts that make me feel insane The static buzz inside my brain So I Read it away. Write it away. Breathe it away. (Over)Think. It. Away. To Hell with you demons. Go plague someone else today. Oh...and see you in a little bit. 😉😑
The sun begins to set in the horizon I muster up the courage to walk like royalty With a few hours of rest, I think I am ready. Heart beats fast, hands are sweaty My brain feels like a time bomb. How do you get ready when you're not ready at all? Standing like a scarecrow I'm the one getting scared Why did you have to choose me? I just want to curl up or even flee. No one else seems to relate I must survive this time. As I leave, the moon begins its work. That's it for today. Tomorrow calls for another chance.
Leased bells, music borrowed, Please, tell me of tomorrow, Of swallows leaving belfries, How else can my ears will, Until I hear their sorrow? Peter, son my lover callous, Draperies and linen, down, Failure? This linebacker asks, Just throw my ball, pass, Runs forever to never catch, How will I know his sorrow? Unless he is, as a tinder match, Tender lover of impossible tasks, Inflamed tether, ball impassible, Gasoline for the man who hits.
Close one eye, My items inside it, Twinking idyllic, Twinkling Poseidon, Tell me but lies. Who is the best, At mules and tribes? Niceness undisguised, Design precise, Thrice but one, Skies full of eyes, Sum kind like, Would it not be wise, Revives, spells and cries, Men, mice and crimes, Pond scum alike, Who is this beggar then? Deckard Cain, who else?
Deep in the forest Between pleasure and pain Screams are so violent Yet silence remains How often do you think of me? Or remember my name? Am I just a memory? Or do you ever think of me? Stridently hopeless Lotso' talk about games Stammers to silence There it goes again again How often do you think of me? Or remember my name? Am I just a memory? Or do you even think of me all? Tomorrow, if you picture it; Another chance to witness someone else's bliss And envy it And live your life in envying Green both in your mind and in your skin Clad in purple cloth worn to protect your sins And mourn the loss of love you stitched into it Around me I see Ghosts of a memory Smoke in the air I breathe A complete lack of energy Dogmatic discomfort Dogmatic disbelief Friends crushing my dreams Becoming the enemy I'm Building a fortress To honor my name To scream at the silence To wander in pain To wonder in fantasy Living each day the same Do you ever think of me? Or am I just a memory? Deep in the forest Between pleasure and pain Screams are so violent Yet silence remains How often do you think of me? Or remember my name? Am I just a memory? Or did you ever think of me at all?
I write oral histories, Stories, opened on lies. So everyone else a liar. I'm not of their kind, Though, I seem like-minded. I seem to like it tough, So your head and cough, I've gotta do my job.