All the gold, silver and jade, Costs, at which attained, All the wars, tanks, and planes, Casts a shadow, twice the grave. Born a slave, no faith, he screams: I have no face, continues aimless. Castle, your prince awaits.
I smear vaseline in the corners of my mouth with a cotton swab to seal the cracks that are carved there from smiling too wide from laughing too loud from speaking my mind. I smudge the nails on my hands with paint, pearlescent and pink to keep from moving to keep from creating to keep from fully living. I confine myself to an apple and egg whites each day to mold by body into what I see in waiting room magazines into what it was when I was a child into something impossible. how futile, it seems, to meter my joy, to suppress the wind. because, when one tries to obstruct what rightfully will pass, it gains strength, channels down one slim canyon, and blows everyone away.
I dreamt indifferently, Subtly smiling at each move, Waves deferentially, That was my heaven. Of pictures and frames, Eventually they go away, Like fitness and pain, Jazz, age, dates and faces, Soon again, time changes. Honey, everlasting joys. One does destroy bees, Sees, consumes, avoid. Like nothing, voice fleeting, Screaming into the void, Lonely, an ocean destroys me.
Paper, mind racing; April, outside rain; Days, time, pain. Trial, minor inheritance, Inside raging, vain, Water droplet pacing. Lies, decadence, Left in the sunset. Am I adept? Think, look back. Flies in everything, Trying anything, I, tried everything. Trial, cherry picking, Many years, Their meaning? A small committee, Press, briefings: Ideas discrete, Their leanings. Where is the time for healing?